Written by:
Dr Penny Van Bergen
Returning to school is an important time for children and parents alike. To ease the transition, there are five helpful steps that parents can take.
- Ask children how they are feeling
Some children may be excited to meet their new teachers, while others may feel nervous about friends or learning. No matter how they feel, validating their emotions and sharing your own school memories can help them feel safe.
- Use play to prepare for new scenarios
Games and role play can help younger children imagine what the new year will be like. Use LEGO minifigures to act out simple “making friends” scripts and remind them that other kids might be feeling shy too.
- Stay relaxed
Research in psychology has shown that anxiety between parents and children tends to be contagious. Talk about the new school year in a natural context – you might be playing together or driving in the car – and move on to other topics naturally too.
- Establish a good routine now
The first few weeks of school are important for setting routines. In the morning this might mean breakfast and uniforms before play, while in the afternoon this might mean allocated homework time and consistent bedtimes to ensure kids are well-rested for school the next day. It’s much easier to set those patterns now than to scramble for changes later in the term!
- Maintain family playtime
As part of your new routine, maintain time for family play. You might work play a board game, solve a puzzle or host your own soccer championship. While it is natural for children to miss the freedom of summer, regular family play time over a shared activity will show children that the fun doesn’t need to stop.
Making time for playtime matters
As children’s lives become busier with homework, parents are often juggling busy home and work lives too. Scheduling family time to play together can protect what matters when other commitments start to add up. However, there’s another benefit too: knowing play time is scheduled gives you both something to look forward to.
In a systematic review of existing research, published by researchers Shaun Sweeney and Charlotte Wilson in 2023, parent anxiety was related to child anxiety in both primary school and high school students. However, there is also good evidence that parents can transmit positive emotions too!
Play is critical throughout our lives, but the benefits of that play might change across time. Play should be play, but conversations with parents along the way will help drive both learning and fun.
For example, parents can use LEGO bricks to talk about addition and subtraction as they build together.
For older teenagers facing end of year exams, introducing family sports, building competitions, or other types of play can be an important way to destress and reconnect with each other.
Penny Van Bergen is a university lecturer and expert in educational psychology. She conducts research focusing on children’s learning and development. She has taught more than 5,000 future early childhood, primary, and secondary school teachers.
